Back from Silence

It has been a while since my last posting. I really missed it, and I am glad to be writing again.
As a baptized and confirmed Catholic, I am called to evangelize by my works and words. It is an important and beautiful ministerial call, one which has taken on a deeper meaning since becoming an aspirant to the Dioceses of Austin Diaconate Program.
The last 7 months have been busy with the diaconate program, selling our old home, renting, and moving into a new home, and increased family and work responsibilities. I felt like my life was a race car traveling at high speeds. Moreover, I felt as if I had gained a new gear to keep up with the fast speed. However, at times I found myself driving erratically, uncertain, and incapable.

One chilly Sunday afternoon in March, I was so overwhelmed by the pace that I left the house and ran like a mad-man around my neighborhood dressed in blue jeans and a long-sleeve sweater. As I ran past people they appeared like blurred images. My body hurt, but I didn’t care; I felt powerless. All of a sudden, however, I felt an impulsive desire to sit down and pray. So I pulled out my single-decade-rosary ring and prayed the rosary three consecutive times. I have never done that. Later, I felt called to go to Adoration where I sat quietly for almost 2 hours.

A few days later, it hit me: the new gear in my life was not meant to equalize the rapid pace, but meant to slow me down. I had it backwards. I gained such a clarity. Now I knew the meaning of the gear and its name, the Holy Spirit. Amazingly, I did not need to stop anything. Instead, I became energetic and focused. Interestingly, around this time, my wife encouraged me to attend a book signing event for a newly released book called Catholic by Choice by Richard Cole. I read the book in a matter of days. It was an inspirational book. Mr. Cole’s account of his conversion to and his joy in joining the Catholic faith was like a refreshing spiritual bath. My heart was elated.

Then, three days before the canonization of John Paul II, I experienced a most wonderful dream. I dreamed that I was running in my childhood neighborhood in Puerto Rico. As I was approaching a wooden house with a porch, I saw St. John Paul II sitting on a rocking chair smiling at me. He was dressed in his papal vestment. I couldn’t help but smile back at him. He looked as happy as a child without worries. As I ran past him, I showed him my single-decade-rosary ring; like a blossoming flower, and his smile became radiant with joy. I woke up mesmerized by the experience like the way I felt when I met my wife. I felt a joy I had not felt in a long time. Later in the week, I described the dream to the priest teaching the diaconal Principles of Theology class. He said, “St. John Paul II is saying that you are doing things well.” I regard this priest as a wise man, and his words animated me. Since then, I have been gathering my thoughts and planning to write again. I am joyful to be writing today.
Have a blessed day!!!

Categories: Faith

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